remember that i once had a blog www.hopeful-hopeless.blogspot.com?
guess what? someone actually took the address after i deleted it.
lolness.
For the sakes of what i want, i can even bleed myself.
do you have to make me feel like there's nothing left of me?
i've been really down lately.
My granpa was part of the reason.
After i'm back from travelling, my granpa was sick. Well not sick, how should i say it. Half of his face suddenly can't function properly anymore. His mouth muscles are not working, and his eyes can't be closed properly. I think he can't sense as well, I'm not very sure since he doesn't talk much ever since the trauma begins, even if we asked him N time already. Pretty much like sequela of stroke, but he don't have stroke. Anyways, the doctors said it was the problem of the nerve, wat the nerve of the half of the face snapped so he can't alter it. It can be healed, which takes at least about 2-6 months for the process. However, that's not the main problem. I don't know what happened to my granpa, maybe feeling hopeless, or he thinks that he got a cancer, or he will be cacat like that for the rest of the life, WE JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT IS HE THINKING. He started not to eat, sleep, or even bath. Yes, no matter how we tam him, how my granny scold him, like whatever, HE JUST WON'T DO A DAMN NORMAL THING. ou yea, u think this is nothing? Imagine whole family is eating out, including relatives, like about 10 ppl. then there was 4-5 adult keep tam an old guy to eat, then the rest just sitting at there staring those adult tam their old granpa to eat. BUT HE STILL WON'T EAT A DAMN THING!! come on la, is it that hard for you to swallow a spoonful of rice?? IS IT THAT HARD???? He just keep saying NO! NO! when we ask him to eat, then when we asked him why not, he just keep queit, then sometimes he will say, what for? Ok la maybe he thinks that eating food, especially rice wont't help him from recovering so he wont eat, but what la, eat liao also won't harm u 1 ma! If you wan't me to say it in a more ugly way, if you think u're going to ngek edy, then eat as much as you can before u ngek! don't live a regretful life! ok back to the story. Then when he beh tahan we keep questioning him, he just stand up and walk away. walao, in a restaurant he also like dat. what can i say any futher?? I'm not afraid of tosoi la, in fact there's quite a lot of people staring at us when we are doing the tam-ing process, but what la so many people worried of you, my granny even cried because of you won't eat anything, and some of my aunt even fly here from kuching specially to visit you because they heard what happend. It's not like one or two meal already, it's every meal ever since the trauma begun. I'm really tired to watch my parents and granny taking care of him, it's like far more tiring than taking care of a naughty child.Well at he end he still will eat a lil thing la, like a few spoonful of rice, some fishy, still some fishy. Yes, he likes fish very much, which i also dunno why. Sometimes he just eat fish, without rice. then sometime he just eat plain rice, without any dish. uhh.
Ok, that's the eating problem. then there was bathing and sleeping problem. same nan gao. bah. imagine bah.
It need a lot of patient to take care of him, which obviously Im seriously lacking of that element. Dat's why I ended up bursting my anger here. I will try though, not to get angry at him anymore. God, please give me the wisdom and patient on how to treat my granpa, and hopefuly he'll be healed soon.
For the sakes of what i want, i can even bleed myself.
hey hey!
Do you still remember?
those time when we chit chat until late night, until i'm too tired and eventually end up sleeping
then i'll wake up in the middle of the night and send u a msg apologizing for my tersleep.
ahhh those time, what a memories =)
hey hey!
Do you remember?
those time when we run to central to shop, even though it is suck.
sometimes we even dare to take a taxi to go downtown.
we're just poor student dat time hahaha
but for me, i was happy in those days
hey hey!
Do you remember?
those days when we're performing on a same stage
we spent days for practising, having fun at the same time
all the preparation are worth when we heard d audience claps for our effort
ahhhh, those bitter sweet memories =)
hey hey!
old friends, how are you lately?
I seriously lost contact with some of you already.
but now when im reminising the old days
I'll miss you guys so much.
lets hangout someday. =)
For the sakes of what i want, i can even bleed myself.
hoho..gonna using back this blog since im currently not being a kiwi ==
Merry christmas everyone!
well, did enjoy the chirsmas eve last night at my church, since im finally not incharged in doing any horrifying jobs anymore=D but, it's quite sad to see the fact that i've only left this place for not more than a year, but things and people just changed. I used to hangout with a few people that are around my age, but now i still have no idea why things will be messed up like this. One busying with her lover, I don't blame that, but the other one, its like she just step out from my gang edy. I tried to talk to her, but just..its weird..but gah, im glad that those younger ones and rachel are still almost the same. I only can conclude that things became quite complicated after i went to nz. haiz.
anyways, gonna go to marcy's open house today. Hell excited as i din get a chance to see her ever since i left kk. WOOHOO. but damn i just had a farking haircut and i don't really felt like hanging out ever since i had that hair cut ==
ARGH..its 2am now..i've been keep sleeping quite late lately...and waking up quite early. Laptop's fault!! :p tata~
For the sakes of what i want, i can even bleed myself.
http://siwikagnieb.blogspot.com/
For the sakes of what i want, i can even bleed myself.
飛機的終站 我旅程的起點
Farewell, my friends...
For the sakes of what i want, i can even bleed myself.
GOD!! I read 1200++ pages of comic in an aftertoon.
Holidays sure is sienz T.T...
For the sakes of what i want, i can even bleed myself.
